Strategic Planning

I had a very odd lunch today. My program director was taking my boss, the program assistant, and me out to lunch for a year-end wrap-up and to plan ahead for the fall. The odd part was that I am leaving in two weeks so we spent the majority of the meeting planning out all the things that the new me will have to do when he/she takes over the hallowed position by the front door that I have occupied for the last two years. I had nothing to contribute since I have essentially checked myself out of the equation for the past several months, and now that I am down to two weeks you couldn't get me to care if you tattooed a transcript of the conversation onto my forehead.

Sitting in on a conversation in which your absence is the main topic is kind of like dying and floating around listening to people talk about you. There is some talk of what you do well, which is nice to hear, but it's certainly not meant to be praise. It's more of the "Shit! She won't be doing that for us anymore! How can we avert disaster?" And then of course there are always the random things that didn't work out quite so well...but since you're not really there, they don't mind saying right out into the open that trying to have me share database duties with the assistant didn't work out AT ALL.

And then to top off the strange lunch, you get the fake smiles and the strained voices congratulating you on your next venture...but you know (from the conversation you just had to sit through) that what they're really thinking is "We're fucked, and it's your fault!!!"